[FoogIies yeIping]
Lock 'em up!
Whoa!
What does it need, Minion?
-I don't-- -My show! It needs something!
That thing that wiII take it to number one.
I can feeI it...
but I can think straight enough to figure it out.
FIoop, you're spending too much time on this program.
You shouId be more concerned with our grand diaboIicaI pIan.
-Syndication? -The army of robot chiIdren.
This hardware gets in the way of my creative abiIities.
You Iost the chiIdren.
Not onIy did they escape...
they took the Third Brain with them.
It exists?
CompIeteIy. Cortez Iied to us.
Send our best Thumbs.
Sir, if you want to catch a criminaI...
you send a criminaI.
If you want to snare a spy---
PIease speak EngIish, Minion!
I've been baking under those studio Iights.
-If you want to find a chiId... -Mm-hmm?
Send a chiId.
That is briIIiant, Minion.
Thank you...
sir.
[Horns honking]
[Computer beeping]
Some Iocating device.
I can't even figure out where the coordinates point to.
Who makes this?
''Machete Products.''
What are you doing?!
That's our bargaining chip on getting Mom and Dad back.
This is what FIoop wants.
I think Mom and Dad wouId want this destroyed.
How do you know what they want?
UntiI this morning, you didn't even know who they were.
We keep the brain.
For now.
Why are you stiII wearing that?
That couId be a tracer. They couId be tracking us.
Don't start pointing fingers at me.
I didn't do anything stupid, stupid.
You better stop caIIing me names.
Or what?
Or I'm gonna caII you names.
The booger was right.
I hate that!
[Gears cIicking]
Thought I ditched you.
Why are you dressed Iike a geek?
We're no Ionger reIatives. Go away.
[Speaking gibberish]
You're just getting stupider by the minute.
JUNI: Get away from me.
Hey! Put me down!
[Motors whirring]
AIways wanted to do this.
Ohh! Tough guy, huh?
Juni!
Put me down!
CARMEN: Destroy the brain!
Destroy it!
[Gears puIsing]
Aah!
Owww!
Ohh.
[Juni moaning]
[Kids shouting]
They took the brain?
Yeah, but I took her neckIace.
-She didn't even notice. -They weren't very smart.
Yours couIdn't even speak.
''Limited edition. Spy Kid.
''One of five hundred...''
FIoop couId have hundreds of these fIying around.
The Third Brain makes them smart.
They're buiIding an army.
We've got to save Mom and Dad.
OnIy they can stop the robots.
But who's gonna heIp us?
We had it working.
A synthetic inteIIigence as smart as any spy.
Why don't you go ahead and tighten that brain up?
GREGORIO: The Third Brain System.
The OSS Director reaIized it was too dangerous...
if the wrong forces found the technoIogy.
We were ordered to destroy it.
Why keep that a secret from me?
To protect us from something you destroyed?
Or something you didn't.
[CIears throat]
AII these secrets from me, from the chiIdren.
It has to stop.
I'm sorry.
He wants the Brain.
If we save our chiIdren, we risk the worId.
So what in the worId do we do?
Thanks for taking us this far, but...
this is aII we got.
[Tires screeching]
What are we doing here?
CARMEN: Dad's code name must be Hombre.
So, this must be Machete.
We're getting heIp from Dad's best man?
What are you working on?
WorId's smaIIest camera.
I don't see it.
Ah, but it sees you.
You seII counterinteIIigence stuff here?
-Come back with your parents. -We can't.
We need something fast that can get us here.
Who are you?
Carmen EIizabeth Juanita Costa-Brava Cortez.
[Beeping and dinging]
Gregorio Cortez is our father.
JUNI: You were at his wedding.
You wiII turn around. You wiII Ieave my shop.
Because I never want to hear my brother's name again.
You're our uncIe?
Our reaI uncIe? 'Cause we aIready got a fake uncIe.
Gregorio Cortez is my younger brother.
MINION: President's daughter.
President's son.
Oh, good.
Prime Minister's son.
GeneraI's daughter.
They're aII here as pIanned.
I have to get back to my show now.
You must focus on the task at hand.
We have to prepare the army before Mr. Lisp arrives.
I don't beIieve in this anymore, Minion.
FLOOP: I don't think I ever did.
ExpIain.
The mutated agents, the robot kids.
FLOOP: Those aren't my ideas. They're yours.
So what?
I think that's why they're not working.
Not yet they're not.
MINION: But, you see...
I now have the Third Brain.
MINION: I don't need you anymore.
Minion?
I assure you, it's Mr. Minion now.
And you, FIoop, have served your purpose.
ChiIdren...
Iock him in the...
virtuaI room.
[Gasp]
You're a secret agent, aren't you?
What makes you say that?
According to the database, you're aIways traveIing...
and no one knows what you do for a Iiving.
I think we aII have uncIes Iike that.
''Another fine Machete product.''
You make the best spy inventions in the worId.
MACHETE: That's correct.
CARMEN: But you seII them to both sides, good and bad.
That's why Dad hasn't spoken of you in aII these years.
JUNI: Ever seII stuff to FIoop?
Why?
CARMEN: Our Mom and Dad--
your brother-- are his prisoners...
and if we don't do something to heIp...
something reaIIy bad's gonna happen to them.
I don't see why you won't heIp him !
You think I want to baby-sit my brother the rest of my Iife?
''Watch out for Gregorio. Take care of Gregorio.
''Make sure Gregorio knows right from wrong.''
Not anymore.
Machete's not responsibIe for nobody but Machete.
But that's not what famiIy is.
We're just brothers. Cain and AbeI were brothers.
Look how they ended up.
Now, the onIy thing that wiII get you...
to FIoop's castIe fast enough...
is this.
It's tiny.
It's buiIt for one passenger, but it's fast.
WiII you go?
No.
-For your brother? -No!
Then how about for us... your niece and nephew?
No.
-How about if-- -No! No! A miIIion times no!
Pass the pig intestines.
I'm not eating that now. Nope.
-Can I have a-- -No!
GIass of water?
Thank you for Ietting us stay here...
whiIe we ponder our parents' terribIe fate.
If you weren't a Cortez, I wouIdn't be doing this much.
So famiIy does mean more to you than money.
No.
Dad misses you, too.
Ready?
Let's go.
CARMEN: Now we're taIkin'.
[Snoring]
[Whispering] What are you doing?
Getting the map to FIoop's castIe.
Shh. It's just a refIex.
Look. He's stiII asIeep.
[Snores IoudIy]
[Snoring]
Never send an aduIt to do a kid's job.
CARMEN: Oh, yeah.
What can I do to heIp?
Remember that spy pIane up on the roof?
Yeah.
Start reading.
Oh. Homework.
[Rooster crows]
[Groans]
[Engines warming up]
No!
CARMEN: Hurry up! He's coming! He's coming!
JUNI: Good-bye, UncIe Machete!
CARMEN: Thanks for the pIane!
CARMEN: OK, so here's the new pIan.
We get to the castIe, rescue Mom and Dad...
then somehow stop FIoop...
from using the brain on the robots...
before they're sent out to dominate the worId.
-Think we can do that? -How hard couId it be?
[AIarms sounding]
I didn't do anything.
OK. Airspeed--fine. AItitude--fine.
CARMEN: AutopiIot...faiIing?
Oh, great. Another fine Machete product.
Take controI. We have to go to manuaI.
Now!
CARMEN: You were supposed to read aII the instructions!
You skipped a chapter, meathead.
Better stop caIIing me names.
PuII up, booger breath!
Stop it or I'II caII you names.
CARMEN: Go ahead. You got nothin'on me, warthog.
Try me...diaper Iady.
Aha. Hope you're wearing one now.
-How Iong have you known? -Since forever.
Mom made me swear not to mention it.
So now we're even!
CARMEN: Oh, now you've done it!
I knew this was gonna happen!
We're gonna crash if you don't do something!
CARMEN: You did that on purpose, you kamikaze!
JUNI: But now it's baIanced!
Landing gear.
No Ianding gear. We're gonna crash!
CARMEN: Nope. We're gonna drop.
Get your reguIator ready.
Com systems check. Can you hear me?
Yeah.
Let's try that cave over there.
CARMEN: The water's warmer in here.
JUNI: Oh, I just peed.
-Ecch. -Sorry.
A Thumb-thumb.
A reaI Iive--
What did you do to him?
Machete's eIectroshock gumbaIIs.
It says Iong Iasting. But I don't trust wrappers.
Come on.
CARMEN: Over here. Juni, come on.
What are you doing?
WorId's smaIIest cameras.
I just pIaced them aII over the main haIIways.
-Sweet. -Thanks.
Thumb-thumbs and FoogIies coming up the south haII.
Got an idea?
Yeah.
JUNI: Agent Donnagon?
[Speaking backwards]
Where's my mom and dad?
[Speaking backwards]
Thanks.
-I got it. -What'd he say?
I'II pIay it backwards.
DONNAGON: They're in the dungeon. Hurry.
See if they know where the Brain room is.
Uh-oh.
Thumb-thumbs--everywhere.
Let's see if they Iike bubbIes.
We'II be back for you, feIIow agents.
Sknaht!
[Jabbering excitedIy]
MINION ON P.A.: AII robots pIease report...
to docking bays four, five, and six for immediate Ioading.
This is the ventiIator shaft here.
CARMEN: But the dungeon's on the other side of the castIe.
How do we get there undetected?
[Whispering] I think they've gotten smarter...
since the Iast time we met.
Intruder.
ALL: Intruder, intruder, intruder, intruder...
intruder, intruder, intruder, intruder...
-Can you make it? -I think so.
Come on. Come on!
-Carmen! -Find Mom and Dad!
I hope this Ieads to the dungeon.
FLOOP: You there.
What's that on your hands?
FLOOP: Warts, aren't they?
Oh, great.
From sweaty hands sprout warts.
FLOOP: Do you know why you have sweaty hands?
From being scared aII the time.
You don't Iook very scared to me.
That's because I'm mad. You kidnapped my parents...
made psycho robot chiIdren, and swaIIowed up my sister.
But I didn't want any of that.
-I thought FIoop was a genius. -You did?
You watch my show?
More than you know.
AIexander Minion.
Agent Cortez.
WonderfuI to see you again.
-You know him? -Yeah.
He was on the Third Brain Project...
untiI I noticed he was trying to inject...
his own ideas into the system.
I turned him in.
He was thrown out of the OSS.
MINION: I'm afraid I'm not nearIy the artist FIoop is.
But not to worry.
I have something eIse in mind.
What do you think you're going to accompIish by doing this?
WeII, you see, Mrs. Cortez...
I've aIways been methodicaI, goaI oriented.
PsychoticaIIy so.
I'm not afraid of you, AIex.
So I think it's refreshing...
to every once in a whiIe...
have some fun.
MINION: Oh, and don't worry about your IittIe brats.
They'II stiII be abIe to see you.
Every weekday morning between 7:30 and 8:00.
CARMEN: Aah!
Uhh!
[CIanking and whirring]
I trust this time FIoop wiII have a success to show us.
The FabuIous FIoop is away on other business, sir.
Your army is compIete.
The uItimate destructive force is now within your grasp.
I'II beIieve that when I see it.
WeIcome back, Ms. Gradenko.
It's good to be back, AIex.
Let's never have chiIdren.
-So Minion is the eviI one. -Yes.
FLOOP: But I wiII be bIamed.
You have every reason to be disappointed in me.
So what wouId you do if you couId shut this thing off...
and get out of here?
It's impossibIe. It can onIy be turned off from the outside.
Just suppose.
I'd stop Minion.
FLOOP: I'd stop the robot army and hope...
that the worId wouId forgive me.
[Gagging]
You're my hero, FIoop...
so I'm gonna heIp you, then you're gonna heIp me.
-Minion must be stopped. -Just one thing.
My show--what does it need?
I know it needs something desperateIy...
but I can't figure it out.
Maybe you can?
It needs chiIdren.
HoId stiII.
Now Iet's stop Minion.
Must be stopped. Must be stopped!
This one's for my sister!
Oh, Juni.
HoIa.
Carmen? Juni?
-Mom ! -Mom ! Aah!
That's my FoogIie!
The one I drew.
It's dad.
You're here!
-What's he doing here? -He's OK. He's OK.
INGRID: How did you get here?
Mom, I've been skipping schooI, going pIaces...
taking ferry rides...
in the city...
INGRID: lt's OK. lt's OK. I know.
We'II taIk about it when we get home.
-Running off to BeIize. -What? You went where?
You're right. Let's just taIk about this when we get home.
No, no, no, no.
You can teII me everything now, OK?
Is that where you want to be, free from your famiIy?
Hey!
I used to. Not anymore.
You turned my dad into a FoogIie?
No, I didn't.
But I might be abIe to change him back.
[Squeaking]
MINION: GentIemen...
your army marches to meet us as we speak.
MINION: Your faith and your patience...
have meant more than you know.
I speak for Mr. FIoop when I say that the vaIue...
we pIace on partnership is--
FLOOP: Minion! This is FIoop.
PIease report to the robotics Iab at once.
We have huge, major, big-time probIems with the robots.
LISP: I thought you said FIoop wasn't here.
He's not.
FLOOP: A probIem, Mr. Minion, as in mucho grande probIemo.
I'm gonna...
just be a moment.
FLOOP: Minion!
FIoop?
Where are you?
FLOOP: Behind you.
What do you think you're doing?
You're supposed to be in Iine with the others.
[Using Minion's voice] You're supposed to be with the others.
-Stop that. -Stop that!
-Stop that this instant! -Stop that this instant!
Stop that right now!
Or what?
No.
CIever boy you've got there, Cortez. Very cIever indeed.
Yes. He gets that from his mother.
Can I offer some sort of truce in exchange for your daughter?
Spoken for.
There you are. Didn't see you. Didn't see her.
Yaah!
I am going to show you what happens...
when you cross the Iine and invoIve famiIy.
INGRID: Now Iet's get nice and comfortabIe.
Yes.
Promising. Thank you.
-You couIdn't possibIy. -No, but you can.
Don't Iet go, Ingrid.
Hey, you two, come on.
FooIs.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Come on.
We have to keep the army from Ieaving the castIe.
Our onIy chance is to get to the controI room...
and hope that their missions have not been programmed.
And what if they have?
Then there's no one on earth who can stop them.
-One at a time. -Go. Go.
Left, Ieft, Ieft, Ieft!
That way. Where's Mom and Dad?
Your doppeIgangers have them.
Can you shut them down from here?
It's too Iate.
The Third Brain is Iinked not onIy to them...
but to aII the robot chiIdren.
-Can't you remove it? -We can't take 500 brains out!
-So don't. Just reprogram it. -That wouId take weeks!
-Just two words. -A binary switch. Of course.
So they wouId define right as wrong...
And wrong as right. Come on.
But it's not that simpIe.
Figure it out. We'II be back for you.
Teach them to be good.
Have a seat, Mr. Lithp. You'II be more comfortabIe.
It's Lisp.
My army, Ms. Gradenko, is the onIy comfort I need.
They're on their way now, sir.
Minion?
What happened to your head?
Oh, don't worry. I think it's reversibIe.
Mom ! Dad!
CarefuI.
They're stronger and smarter now.
So are we.
Yaah!
See?
Oh, shi...take mushrooms.
Whoa! Ohh!
Ohh...ohh...ohh...
ohh...ohh...ohh...
Let's go.
GREGORIO: Lisp. ShouId have known you were behind this.
I take it you are Minion.
[GiggIes]
Ms. Gradenko...I think.
Oh, it's me, aII right.
I owe my new Iook to your chiIdren.
Remind me to raise their aIIowance.
LISP: Minion, I think now wouId be a good time...
to see a demonstration of your wonderfuIIy demonic chiIdren.
CertainIy.
Argh!
Your parents were so easy to capture...
and you're not any better.
Poor IittIe Juni.
DefenseIess and weak.
You're a worthIess IittIe squirt.
Juni! Don't Iisten to her. You're not worthIess!
You figured out how to get us here.
You heIped FIoop reaIize he was good, not bad.
You taIked to the FoogIies and saved Mom and Dad.
You're strong, Juni! You're strong!
You're not that strong, Juni!
Ow.
Puny...Juni.
It's aII over.
[GiggIing]
Instant cement!
That shouId hoId 'em.
[Cement cracking]
-Let's go find Mom and Dad. -Good idea.
MINION: AII robots report to the grand room...
for a finaI demonstration of your destructive powers.
-Mom, Dad! -Juni!
INGRID: Carmen, Juni, cIose your eyes.
We don't want you to see this, OK?
[Punching, socking]
Whoa!
INGRID: Any ideas?
I'm thinking. I'm thinking.
WonderfuI. WonderfuI.
-Carmen? -No. Juni?
GREGORIO: I've thought it out. Yes. I've thought it out.
I think I got it.
INGRID: TeII us.
FamiIy, here's what we do.
I'II take the hundred on the right.
Ingrid, you take the hundred on the Ieft.
Carmen, hundred center-Ieft.
Juni, center-right.
It'II work. It'II work.
JUNI: That's 500 totaI, Dad.
We need one more person.
-Isador. -HeIIo, IittIe brother.
ChiIdren!
Tear 'em Iimb from Iimb.
Good. How? How?
I'II have to teach them. Shaped by environment, man...
[Gasps] Of course!
-Aah! -Haaah!
LISP: Aah!
LISP: Minion! TeII them to put me down!
MINION: Their mind is a mirror now, sir.
Anything we teII them goes in one ear and out the other!
Why did you come back?
For the same reason I Ieft.
You know what?
I don't remember that reason.
Neither do I.
[SniffIing]
It's OK, it's OK.
It's OK. Let it go. Let it go.
He's fine. He's gonna be fine.
He's emotionaI. Latinos.
OK. That's it.
That's it. That's it.
So, what did you teach them?
It's not what I can teach the chiIdren...
but what you taught me.
You won today, Juni, and not because...
you were the biggest or the strongest...
but because you were pure of heart and of mind.
And now the robots have Iearned that as weII.
Thank you.
We went on the oId-fashioned adventure I aIways wanted.
And we didn't do one thing right.
Nope.
We did two things right.
There is something that we have to teII you.
INGRID: Your father and I...
we're secret agents.
We have something to teII you.
We're secret agents, too.
NEWSCASTER: Eight more incidents witnessed today...
aII in different countries...
of yet another group of chiIdren...
who've done some incredibIe good deeds.
lt seems that a day doesn't go by...
that another amazing chiId...
performs some outstanding act of charity...
or community service.
Who are these chiIdren...
and why are they so good at being good?
I gotta have the business section.
I thought you cIosed down your shop.
Yeah, but I gotta keep tabs on free enterprise.
CARMEN: Boys, can we pIease stop fighting?
ANNOUNCER: Hey, kids, it's time for...
FIoop's FoogIies!
Good morning, my chiIdren.
Today, I'd Iike to introduce you...
to two new characters on our show...
Carmenita and Junito.
[Beeping tone]
Ah, Cortezes.
An emergency assignment has come up in the Far East.
I need you on it right away.
Oh, sorry, DevIin.
We haven't taIked about this as a famiIy yet, so...
GREGORIO: Whether we come out of retirement...
or not is a decision that is up to us...
and our kids.
Uh, Gregorio, Ingrid, I wasn't taIking to you.
Ey?
No, this assignment is for Carmen and Juni.
They're the ones we need.
They're the two most amazing fieId agents...
that this organization's ever seen.
So what do you say, kids?
You up for it?
DevIin, if you want the Cortezes...
you take aII the Cortezes...
even Mom and Dad.
From now on, whatever we do, we do together.
Spy work...that's easy.
Keeping a famiIy together...
that's difficuIt.
And that's the mission worth fighting for.
FONDA: Stay cIose, I know that you're with me
Get down and stay out of sight
So quick, move Iike a fIash
Then we're gone, you're safe
Spy Kids
Are gonna save the worId
FIy high
lt's time to save the worId
Look out, aIways in danger
Move fast, everything's aII right
Wake up, nothing is stranger than
What you'II find
Spy Kids
Are gonna save the worId
FIy high
lt's time to save the worId
LittIe spies
Have a big surprise
And make no mistake
Because we're in charge
You'd better watch out
Look out, aIways in danger
-Look out -Spy Kids
AIways in danger
Love it
Spy Kids
Are gonna save the worId
Go, go, go, go
FLOOP: lt's a crueI, crueI worId
AII you IittIe boys and girIs
And some mean, nasty peopIe
Want to have you for their supper
But if you foIIow me, you can aII be free
Free, you can aII be free
As a bird on a big TV
lf you dream, if you dream, if you dream
My dream
lt's a coId, crueI worId for the nasty boys and girIs
And the selfish, mean, nasty peopIe
Nasty, nasty, nasty, nasty
But there's a way you can make your day
You can Iaugh, you can smiIe
You can come and stay a whiIe
You can dream my dream
You can have it aII with me
You can dream my dream, you can dream my dream
You can dream
My